A hillbilly raiding the fridge at midnight, it’s Cooking with Hank

Hillbilly Midnight “Fridge Raid” Quesadilla

Ingredients (aka “whatever hasn’t expired”)

• 1 tortilla (or 2 if ambitious)
• 1-2 handfuls of shredded cheese (the funkier, the better)
• 1 egg (optional, but makes it fancy)
• Leftover meat: sausage, bacon, cold fried chicken, or mystery mystery meat
• Veggies: pickles, peppers, onions—whatever’s limp
• Hot sauce, ketchup, or mystery jar sauce for flair
• Butter or oil (for dramatic crisping)

Directions

1. Heat the skillet: Butter it like you mean it. Medium heat. Let the butter sizzle—if it smokes a little, that’s flavor.
2. Egg hack: If you’re using an egg, scramble it in the pan first. If you aren’t, skip to step 3.
3. Tortilla toss: Lay the tortilla flat in the skillet. Sprinkle cheese over half. Add your meat and veggies like a reckless Picasso.
4. Fold it: Fold the tortilla in half like you’ve done this 100 times (you haven’t). Press down with spatula.
5. Crisp it: Cook for 2-3 minutes per side until cheese is melty and tortilla is golden brown. Optional: talk to it while cooking, it helps.
6. Optional hot sauce swirl: Add some swirls of hot sauce or ketchup for dramatic effect.
7. Serve immediately: Eat standing over the sink if necessary.

2:30 AM Commentary

• “This is literally a mess, but it’s my mess.”
• “I’m half asleep and fully impressed with myself.”
• “If anyone sees me eating this, I will call it ‘artisan’.”Why it works at 2:30 AM:

• Quick. No measuring. Chaos-approved.
• Uses leftovers like a hillbilly MacGyver.
• Cheesy, salty, crispy—hits all brain food signals.

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